


Foot in my mouth

by szzzes



Category: Naruto
Genre: College AU, Humour, M/M, anko cackling is thing right???, humour for the angsty broken hearted people WHO SHIP RARE SHIPS, i never really know what is going on in canon, pining dorks, potty mouth, so genma and raidou are boyfriends because i saw it happen in a fic once
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-16
Updated: 2015-07-16
Packaged: 2018-04-09 14:25:19
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4352375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/szzzes/pseuds/szzzes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>College AU - In which Kakashi's talent is fucking up. This tends to happen when you have a gigantic crush the size of the hokage monument. (also side character with sass are my life goals)</p>
            </blockquote>





	Foot in my mouth

**Author's Note:**

> You can read this on tumblr too u nerds. i post there earlier so there.
> 
> Might have some ooc bc i dont even follow canon anymore. Comedy for you if your heart has been broken by angsty fic.
> 
> Listening to Sing by Ed Sheeran (but it has no relation to the fic i just like the beat)

_It’s really unfair_ , Kakashi thinks as he looks over Genma’s shoulder and peers at Obito, who’s group of friends are laughing and yelling, boisterous and making way too much noise at a public place.

“Stop!” Obito’s voice is loud, near hysterical as his words are jumbled together with his laughter as his friend _(Asuma, Kakashi thinks darkly, jealousy stabbing through his heart like a blunt stake)_ digs his fingers mercilessly into the teen’s side, tickling him with no plans to stop despite Obito’s protests.

“You asshole!” Obito’s laughing, and he tries to escape from Asuma’s grasp.

Kakashi huffs darkly, turning his attention back to his friends. Genma and Raidou are smirking at him, and he wonders why he’s friends with them.

“Jealous, Kakashi?” Genma asks him, tone knowing and amused, smirk on his face. Beside him Raidou has the same smirk on his face, and Kakashi has to force himself not to growl at his friends.

He does, however, vehemently deny their accusations _(which just happens to be his feelings but they don’t need to know that)_. “I’m not jealous,” he grounds out. His crossed arms are tense as he fights his urge to peer over Genma’s shoulder and to take another look at Obito.

“Really?” Genma asks, tone sounding innocent and believing but from the smirk that is still on his face, Kakashi knows better.

Raidou shrugs. “You’re jealous.”

Kakashi wonders why he’s still friends with them. “I’m not.“

“Sure, if that’s what you say, Kakashi.” Genma replies, shifting slightly so that he blocks Kakashi’s view of Obito.

Really, he wonders why he’s still friends with them.

After a moment of silence, with Kakashi trying and failing to get X-ray version to look through Genma’s shoulder _(that’s blocking the sunlight, not his view of Obito, dammit)_ , Kakashi huffs, pretending to text on his phone. Genma and Raidou know better though, still smirking.

“Why don’t the two of you go elsewhere and make out, huh?” He glares at them.

They ignore his words. “Why Kakashi? Am I interfering with something here?” Genma asks in that annoying too-kind, too-curious tone of his. _(Obviously, Kakashi doesn’t buy it.)_

Raidou snorts. “Isn’t it obvious, Genma? You’re interfering with his ability to eye-fuck Obito.”

Kakashi really hates his friends.

.

It had been an exhausting day, really, with Genma and Raidou making it worse with their insistent, _‘you’re jealous’_ , _‘just confess already you giant dork’_ and absolute lack of respect for his feelings.

He’s about to enter his room when he spots the stack of cards and gifts piled at his doorstep. He resists the urge to groan.

“Why do I have to clean this up everyday?” He mutters to himself quietly, squatting down and picking up the cards and gifts carelessly, pushing the ones he can’t carry aside with his foot.

“Wow, that’s a lot of gifts.” A voice comes from behind him, and Kakashi jumps, recognising the voice, heart beating faster.

Obito’s standing there, bright, black eyes fixated on the numerous gifts in Kakashi’s arms.

There’s silence and Kakashi is momentarily stunned by the sight in front of him. _Holy shit he’s hot._ (This seems to be his train of thought whenever Obito is involved.)

“Uh… do you want some?” He finally says, but wishes he had just kept his mouth shut instead. That sounded like he was gloating.

Immediately, Obito glares at him. “Really, Kakashi?” He grounds out, before stalking off with a huff, pulling out his phone and looking for Asuma.

Kakashi really wants the ground to eat him up now.

.

“You what?” Genma’s voice is impossibly loud when Kakashi relays what happened at the dorms to his friends. _(Why were they still friends?)_

Kakashi groans, hiding his face in his hands. “What was I even thinking about at that time?“

Genma smirks “Probably how hot he was and how you wanted to find the nearest hard surface and have your way with him.”

Kakashi glares at him. “I was not.” _At least not completely, anyway._

The two grin, nodding. “Sure.“

Kakashi really thinks he needs to get new friends.

.

It only gets worse.

.

They’re assigned as work partners and Kakashi vows to keep his mouth shut, before he says something and regrets it. He doesn’t know if this tactic works or not, seeing that Obito still glares at him. _(It doesn’t.)_

“Kakashi, what do you think of doing Greek mythology for our essay?” Obito asks, chewing on the top of his pen as he looks at Kakashi.

Kakashi is momentarily distracted by Obito’s lips. But he has learnt his lesson and he keeps his mouth shut so that he won’t say something that makes him regret his existence immensely and immediately.

He shrugs, struggling to remember what was Obito asking him.

Obito eyes at him, glaring. “Kakashi. What do you think of doing Greek mythology?” There’s annoyance in his voice now, and Kakashi blinks, snapped out of his trance.

“Uh…”

There’s a sigh, and Obito’s tapping his feet, obviously impatient. But the pen is still near his lips and Kakashi panics.

“You should stop biting your pen.” Kakashi blurts out, but except he doesn’t, because his has his default poker face on and looks like he’s just picking on Obito’s fault.

Obito drops his pen. Then he growls. “ _Greek mythology?_ ”

Kakashi wants to shoot himself.

Instead, he shrugs. “Sure, whatever.” Then he packs his things and flees. _(Except he walks out calmly and doesn’t look like he’s fleeing from anything.)_

.

He has a feeling that the smirks won’t be stopping anytime soon, if at all, and that this whole ‘denying your feelings’ won’t be as effective as it was before.

“Kakashi,” Genma starts, snorting and chuckling and just outright laughing at Kakashi, “God can I _please_ tweet your sad love life? I’m pretty sure the hashtag ‘#Kakashifucksup’ will be trending.“

Raidou is opposite him, shaking his head as he chuckles quietly, no doubt in agreement with his boyfriend.

“Shut up.” Kakashi growls, still feeling pretty mortified at all his fuck-ups. Distantly he thinks the hashtag is pretty apt, describing his life perfectly before he squashes the thought ruthlessly.

Genma snorts. “Maybe _you_ need to shut up, Kakashi.”

_It’s sad, but he does have a point._

Kakashi wonders if he even has friends, but the thought is soon abandoned as Obito and his friends pass by their little group, laughing and making a ruckus as they head to their usual spot just behind Kakashi. Raidou offers to trade seats with Kakashi so that he can ‘eye-fuck Obito’.

Kakashi only accepts because he knows that Raidou wants to sit beside his boyfriend.

He doesn’t ignore the two lovebirds in favour of peering over Genma’s shoulder to look at Obito.

Nope, not at all.

.

_I have it bad,_ Kakashi admits, when he and Obito work on the last part of their Greek Mythology paper, and Kakashi wonders why did he even take this class.

_Oh yeah. Because Obito was in it._

“Do you have anything you want to add in?” Obito asks, eyeing him warily as he hands the third draft to Kakashi to read through. Wordlessly, Kakashi takes the paper, and tries to read through the numerous words as Obito pulls out his phone to text his friend.

Instead he finds himself peering over the paper to stare at Obito.

He hasn’t even realised that time passed so quickly, when he’s still on the first page, first line and Obito puts his phone down, looking at him. “You done?”

Kakashi keeps his mouth shut.

“Well? What’s taking you so long?” Obito asks, annoyed at the lack of response.

Kakashi really thought that he had already learned his lesson. It seems, however, that he hasn’t.

“Your handwriting is so messy.” Kakashi mutters, Obito frowns.

“Whatever.” He grumbles, turning away and resumes texting on his phone.

Kakashi wonders why did god give him a mouth and struggles to focus on the essay.

.

“Just confess to him already.” Genma snorts, and Kakashi feels strangely insulted that he doesn’t even look up from his phone anymore. Raidou shrugs, looking at Kakashi in the way that screamed ‘done with your shit’.

“I don’t know. He thinks I’m an asshole.“

“Who doesn’t?”

“Fuck you.” Kakashi growls, and winces when Raidou kicks his shin under the table, glaring at him.

Genma blinks. “Sorry. Only Raidou has that privilege. Why don’t you go and find Obito instead?”

Raidou’s smirk is impossibly smug.

Kakashi groans.

.

“-every inch the smug, arrogant asshole. Like everything is handed to him on a silver platter and I’m beneath him.” Obito complains to Asuma.

Asuma raises and eyebrow, looking past Obito and at Kakashi.

“Really? Sounds like you’re disappointed.” Asuma responds casually, picking on his food. “Like you like him or something.“

There’s a small flush that no one in their group misses. Obito groans and puts his face in his arms.

“ _You like him!_ ” Kurenai and Anko smirk, and Obito groans again.

“I thought he looked hot.” He mumbles, tips of his ears completely red.

“Aww.” Kurenai pets him like he’s a dog, talking to him like he’s a seven year old kid.

“Bless your little gay heart.” Anko cackles, going back to her drink.

Obito is beyond mortified.

.

_(Kakashi and Obito doesn’t know that Anko, Kurenai, Asuma, Genma and Raidou actually take a few classes together.)_

.

It takes a couple blind dates, arranged ‘oh what a coincidence’ and _‘_ you need a plus one for this party  _(their parties never needed a plus one)_ ’ for the two to become friends.

Still, it’s a long shot from being able to confess to each other.

“I don’t understand why Professor Madara is so insistent on having a lesson on Friday morning!” Obito groans, trudging through the campus. Kakashi is beside him, eyeing him in amusement.

_(Thank god for no more foot-in-my-mouth moments.)_

“Maybe he just hates you.” Kakashi smirks, and Obito frowns, punching Kakashi in the arm.

“Shut up. At least we don’t have any print outs to submit. This way I’ll be able to get more sleep.”

Kakashi stops, blinking at his friend. “We do, though. For Professor Tsunade’s class?“

Obito stops, glancing at Kakashi with wide eyes and Kakashi really can’t help but let the amused smirk settle on to his face. Immediately, there’s a glare directed at him.

“Kakashi. You didn’t.”

Kakashi shrugs, before making a show of looking into his bag. “Oh. It seems that I forgot to pass you the print outs.“

Obito screams. “Kakashi you _asshole!_ ”

.

_(“Was Kakashi always this much of a jerk?” Kurenai asks, absent-mindedly sipping her coffee as she watched Obito trying to strangle Kakashi._

_“Yes.” Genma answers immediately, still looking at his phone. “Always this much of a jerk.“_

_“But Obito’s pretty much an idiot too, huh.”_

_Silence._

_“They suit each other really well. They should just confess and get together already.“_

_“Kakashi! Give me those print outs!” Distantly, they can hear Obito yell angrily as Kakashi looks through his bag._

_“Don’t have them.”_

_“Twenty bucks that Kakashi will let Obito copy his print out just before their classes start.” Anko suddenly blurts out._

_Genma and Raidou glance at her, incredulous. “No way. No matter how much Kakashi likes Obito, he’s still a jerk. Twenty bucks that Kakashi will just let Obito struggle on his own.” Genma responds, and Raidou nods in agreement._

_In the end, Kakashi lets Obito copy from his print out. He raises his eyebrow in confusion when Genma glares at him, stabbing a pen into his stomach. “I lost twenty bucks because of you!”_

_Raidou just smirks. “You’ve changed.“)_

.

“I’m going to do it.” Obito announces suddenly, placing his food tray down on the table and looking more determined than he has ever been in his life.

A chorus of _‘oohs’_ escape from his friends, and even Asuma looks impressed, nodding proudly.

“I…” Kakashi wonders if he should even tell his friends anything.

Genma grins. “Are you finally going to confess to him?”

Kakashi nods.

.

“Kakashi! Can I uh-“ Obito runs after Kakashi and stops, stumbling after his own words and running a hand through his hair. “I wanted to talk to you.“

Kakashi raises an eyebrow. “Yeah, I was about to find you too.”

Obito grips his bag nervously. “Yeah I uh- wanted to ask you something.“

There’s silence and Kakashi raises an eye brow, waiting for Obito.

“Yeah?”

Obito clears his throat, stuttering and stumbling over his words. “Uh… I er…

Kakashi shifts on his feet, tapping his foot. _(Vaguely, he realises that this isn’t the kind of behaviour people exhibit when they want to confess to someone, or when they’re talking to their crush. Thank god Obito doesn’t notice, or is already used to his jerk-ish tendencies.)_

A few more stumbling and stuttering later, Obito drops his head in defeat and sighs, muttering to himself.

“ _Oh, fuck me._ ” Obito curses, running a hand through his hair.

Before Kakashi can stop himself, the words are tumbling out of his mouth. “That can be arranged.”

Obito’s head snap up, looking at him in confusion before realisation dawns on him and he blushes bright red. “You-“

Kakashi blinks, realising what he just said. He blinks again, clearing his throat. He looks calm and composed but there’s a traitorous flush on his cheeks. “I like you. Would you go out with me?”

Obito can only nod dumbly, face still red.

.

_(“That was the most un-romantic confession ever,” Genma grumbles._

_Kakashi rolls his eyes. “Sorry, I wasn’t aware that I had to impress you and that I would be graded on how romantic I would be. What are the other categories?“_

_Genma, completely missing the sarcasm, shrugs. “You did pretty well in the sexy department, I guess. Though I hope that you’ll do better for your marriage proposal.”_

_Kakashi chokes on his drink, before glancing at Raidou who’s paling slightly. “Good luck.” He smirks, hand on Riadou’s shoulder, because this is revenge and it has never been sweeter.)_

.

_(Anko cackles, Kurenai and Asuma smirk when Obito relays to them what happened. He groans, face flushing and burying his head into the crook of his arms again._

_“So, did you guys set a date and time?” Anko asks, wriggling her eyebrows. Obito smacks her.)_

 

END

**Author's Note:**

> Exhibit A: Kakashi having a gigantic crush but still behaving like a jerk. Amazing.


End file.
